Turkey Run: Based on true events

I remember watching my dad cut off a turkey’s head. That’s what has to happen when one chooses to eat turkey, chicken, goose, or any other kind of foul, and we had a chicken coop at one of the homesteads of my childhood. We mostly just had chickens, but one time we had a turkey, and he was there for one reason.

My friend down the road told me about headless chickens running around his family’s farm yard. They even chased him! His father had severed the head of each one, and apparently he was pretty quick about it because there were a bunch of them all running at the same time. Needless to say, I was a bit nervous about what I was about to see.

He brought the bird to a railroad tie that was laying on the ground not far from the coop, and then realized that it would be a bit hard to do this himself. He probably figured it would be awkward for me to hold the turkey while he did the decapitating, especially since I was young (10 or 11) and since we kids had named the turkey “Tom” and might have a tinge of sentimentality toward him. So he just had me make sure it didn’t get away while he went and grabbed some tools that would help. He came back and hammered two nails into the railroad tie, about an inch and a half from each other. Then he took the turkey back, set it down, placed its neck between the two nails and then bent the nails over so that they’d hold the bird in place. Then, one small swing.

And, sure enough, Tom took off flapping and running like mad. Having spent quite a few years close to farmers and having a very small farm on our own property for a time, I understood that this was just the nerve endings in their bodies obeying their innate responses. It just needed to get every flap, run, and kick out of its system. When it seemed to be  getting a little too far away from us my father would go and stand in its way or maneuver it somehow back over to the chicken yard (And yes, all the chickens were in the coop and not outside having to watch the carnage.). I didn’t do much to help. I’d just step out of the way when it came towards me. Ironically, I didn’t want to appear “chicken” in front of my dad, so I didn’t run. But I did not want that thing chasing me. If it did, it would obviously have absolutely nothing at its disposal to hurt me. It didn’t even have a head, for Pete’s sake. But that headless turnkey creeped me out. This was the early 80’s so I didn’t have that phrase to express how I felt, but “creeped out” was definitely what I was at the time.

Thankfully, Tom is remembered fondly as a beautiful and very delicious meal. I think it was even Thanksgiving. Way to take one for the team Tom!

Congratulations . This is your week.

Best Actress: Catherine O’Hara as Sally (and Shock) in I always love her performances in any movie or TV show she’s been in. Her most recent, , is the best thing on television right now.

Best Actor:

Owen Wilson as Coach Skip in

Best Quote: “If what I think is happening, IS happening… It better not be.” — Mrs. Fox (Meryl Streep) in

And my favourite stop-motion animated films of all time are…

9. (1994)

(2005)

7.(2009)

6. (2012)

5. (2000)

4.(1993)

3. (2016)

2. (2009)

1. (2009)