Trust your gut, before your head gets in the way.

“Trust your gut before your head gets in the way.” – Detective Josephus Miller, The Expanse, S1E08: Salvage

Alcohol never made anything better. Sure, the first couple of drinks felt good because all the pleasure centres in my brain were tickled, tricking me into believing that the high meant I was happy. But warning bells would already be going off by the end of glass two. My gut, my intuition was already telling me to stop. But that warm, fluttering, overheating feeling spreading across my mid-section—that was meant to be a powerful message from my psyche telling me to pay attention to what was going on around me—would be interpreted by my brain as something to fear. It’s usually a good thing, a healthy thing. My way of dealing with it though, was to block it out as fast as I could, with more drinks. My intuition putting me on alert had become a trigger, and my go-to response back then, was to numb everything. To turn it all off. Bartender! Another!

According to the Harvard Business Review, there’s a science to trusting your gut: “Despite popular belief, there’s a deep neurological basis for intuition. Scientists call the stomach the ‘second brain’ for a reason. There’s a vast neural network of 100 million neurons lining your entire digestive tract. That’s more neurons than are found in the spinal cord, which points to the gut’s incredible processing abilities.When you approach a decision intuitively, your brain works in tandem with your gut to quickly assess all your memories, past learnings, personal needs, and preferences and then makes the wisest decision given the context. Everyone knows what it feels like to have a pit in your stomach as you weigh a decision. That’s the gut talking loud and clear.”

But, for some of us, that’s where repressed memories and unhealed trauma can throw a wrench into our thought process. If it’s enough of a struggle or a burden, it’s easier for us to drown it. I used to be really good at that. Even felt a bit proud about being able to say, to hell with it. My brain had actually convinced me that I was liberating myself—from pain, stress, struggle and over-thinking—by having another drink. The rush that gave me, always invited more.

When I decided to go alcohol free, those emotions I’d been blocking out came flooding back in. It was a lot, but I was determined to experience them all, the lows and the highs. Learning to sit with my feelings and emotions is an ongoing process, but I am getting better at working through them without over-intellectualizing the whole thing (that’s just another way of turning them off).

Then there’s a super-power we can gain when we give up drinking: intuition. Gut feelings that, when we learn to trust them, offer so much wisdom and guidance. It’s not all that easy, as intuition tends to surface unexpectedly and intensely, and disappears just as quickly leaving us mulling over what we’ve felt. Intuition can feel unfamiliar after years of numbing all emotions, and until we learn to trust our gut, our heads will get in the way. The over-analyzing can make us doubtful, uncomfortable, anxious, afraid and unwilling to move forward.

About six months after I gave up drinking, I began to feel healthier, and my mind cleared as did my intuition. I started to trust myself more and had decided to let my heart lead me where it would. I felt the pull and tug of certain workshops and classes and I followed with an open mind and an open heart, sometimes not knowing what to expect, but never regretting the decision to attend. Without the physical, psychological and emotional fallout from drinking, there was more space and time in my life for opening doors and widening avenues on my true path. It’s been nine years, and while I am still working on strengthening my intuition with intention, I trust my self more than ever before.

HBR says: “Discern gut feeling from fear. Fear tends to be accompanied by bodily sensations of constricting or minimising. You may feel tense, panicky, or desperate. Fear has a pushing energy, as if you’re trying to force something, or selecting an option because you want to avoid a threat, rejection, or punishment. Fear also tends to be dominated by self-critical thoughts that urges you to hide, conform, or compromise yourself.

“Intuition on the other hand has pulling energy, as if your choice is moving you toward your best interest, even if that means pursuing a risk or moving more slowly than others. This is usually accompanied by feelings of excitement and anticipation or ease and contentment. Physically, gut feelings tend to cause your body to relax. With intuition, your inner voice is more grounded and wise, like a good mentor.”

There are some good advice here, with actionable strategies to stop overthinking and start trusting your gut: https://hbr.org/2022/03/how-to-stop-overthinking-and-start-trusting-your-gut

~*~

The annual AtoZ Challenge is happening this month and prompted by the 2023 theme ‘Resilience’, here’s nine years sober, and counting… with some things to say, inspired by quotes from brilliant television series that resonate with me.