Time flies like a train… fruit flies like a banana

My son and I were watching Bohemian Rhapsody (2018) last night. In a particular scene showing some tension between the band members, one character tells Freddie Mercury he’s late and he returns with, “I’m a performer dahling, not a Swiss train conductor.”

Trains are often alluded to with reference to time. The exact hour in which they are set to arrive or leave is top priority. They also speed through just about any terrain swiftly, and mostly in a linear direction. (It’s funny that airplanes are even more in both of those examples, but trains still have that connection, the image of the conductor with the hat and white gloves looking down at a pocket watch.) Looking to my left as we watched, I saw my son, now a man: complete with a job, a car, an apartment, as well as the responsibilities that go along with all of that. In that moment it sure did feel like my life had been speeding by like a bullet train.

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Ok, enough of sentimental metaphors. Let’s get to some lists…

Top 10 Movies Set (Largely) on a Train 

Titles marked with an asterisk (*) are ones I have yet to watch, but I’ve included them according to 1) How much I want to see them and especially 2) how much talk and adoration it gets still today. 

• Bullet Train (2022) – It’s a little premature to put this movie on this list, but I’m still riding high on it right now. Don’t listen to cousin Petrina! It’s hilarious!
  

• The Polar Express (2004)

• The Darjeeling Limited (2007)*
  

• The Great Train Robbery (1903) – I’m not sure how much anyone today would enjoy watching this, but it’s short and has a few good shots. It was also a kind of pioneer movie in many respects.
  

• Murder on the Orient Express (1974)* – I watched the 2017 remake and enjoyed it for the most part. People seem to have more reverence for this one. 
  

The Taking of Pelham One Two Three

(1974)

• * – Again, I watched the remake and wouldn’t have added it here, but there seems to be a lot of love for the original.
  

• Train to Busan (2016)* – I really can’t believe I still haven’t seen this… 
  

• Snowpiercer (2013)

• Strangers on a Train (1951)

• The General (1926) – It’s old, it’s silent, it’s black and white, but you can watch and enjoy it nearly 100 years later.

Honourable mentions:3:10 to Yuma (2007); Transsiberian (2008); Silver Streak (1976, I think it’s the first movie made with the great duo of Richard Pryor and Gene Wilder); The Lady Vanishes (1938… I want to see this one.)

Top 10 movies with great train scenes (titles from the above list not included):

• Throw Mama From the Train (1987) – I remember my siblings and I having a great time imitating the titular mother of this movie (Anne Ramsey) yelling “Owen!!”
  

• Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid (1969)

• Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989) – “Why did it have to be snakes?”
  

• Back to the Future Part III (1990) – This is actually one of the first movies to come to my mind when I thought about movies with great train scenes.
  

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone

(2001)

• – It’s not really a scene really, just the coolest movie train ever.
  

• Hugo (2011) – I hate to describe the scene considering it could be a spoiler, but it’s fantastic. Scorcese was recreating an event that actually happened in 1895. Also, this is a very visually satisfying movie taking place in an old train station.
  

• Anastasia (1997) – An entire chapter of the movie is set on a train, and—like the rest of the movie—the scenes are fun, thrilling, and beautiful.
  

• Spider-Man 2 (2004) – There’s a great scene of Peter Parker saving people aboard a train that’s speeding out of control, bound for a crash.
  

• The Lone Ranger (2013) – Ok, so most people didn’t like this movie, and the criticism of Depp playing an Indigenous man gives even less incentive to watch it. But you have to see the train fight scene. Amazing.
  

• Stand By Me (1986) – “TRAIN!!!!!”

Honourable Mentions:The Wolverine (2013); Mission: Impossible (1996); From Russia With Love (1963); Planes, Trains and Automobiles (1987); Source Code (2011)*; Some Like It Hot (1959); O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000); The Hunger Games (2012); Before Sunrise (1995)

Congratulations Strangers on a Train. This is your week.

And the Oscar goes to…

Best Actress:

Tilda Swinton as Mason in Snowpiercer

Best Actor: Sacha Baron Cohen as Station Inspector in Hugo

Best Quote: “I may be old-fashioned, but I thought murder was against the law.” – Farley Granger as Guy Haines in Strangers on a Train

I know only a few of my friends and family would know the name Greg Boyce, but he’s a guy I went to college with I just got news yesterday that he died of cancer. He and I weren’t close, but I knew him and he was a great guy. At his funeral there will be plenty of wonderful stories shared and a lot of well-deserved words of adoration I am sure. So this post is for him. You will be missed greatly Greg.