The Music That Made Me.

Growing up I always gravitated towards gaming. It was a permanent fixture in our household, owed to my father’s exuberant affinity for them, that had a reciprocal affect on myself. A seemingly hereditary condition that has only flourished since. Though my parents encouraged me to go outside, explore and engage in all of the recreations you associate with youth, they never prohibited my burgeoning predilection’s. Moderation was a requisite discipline in my upbringing, and a result accomplished by the superlative techniques of my mother’s conscientious teachings. (Thanks Mum). Movies and television were both firm patrons of my reticent seclusion from social responsibilities as well. Distractions that contributed to my affection for cinema. Though I’m sure repeated viewings of “Scooby-Doo And The Ghoul School” hardly constitutes as anything neighbouring cinimatic granduer. Yet despite the veritable discoveries of adolescence, music was a glaring omission.

For the longest of time I was convinced that I didn’t like music. My peers were all captivated by the ubiquitous sounds of the Top 40. Reciting the lyrics of some vapid “Pop Artist”, as if it were the profound composition of an Oscar Wilde poem. I’m not trying to be snobbish and I certainly don’t think all music should be nuanced, but it has to resonate with the listener on a subconscious level. It’s not even that their facetious vacuity was somehow offensive to my cultured sensibilities. It just never roused any kind of emotional response from me. Not even disdain. That was until I discovered Metal.

Metal, the proportionately “Heavy” kind, is a much maligned genre. Avoided by most conservative minded and those of a nervous disposition, who are inclined to dismiss it as morbid curiosity. Indulged by those with a penchant for abrasive, anarchic, kitten drowning necromancy. A blasphemous cacophony of repugnant profanity that infects the impressionable mind’s of its listeners, compelling them to commit dubious acts against their fellow man. Such as growing your hair long and wearing monochromatic clothes or chains. Though I’ll concede that this is an exaggerated interpretation of the genre though, because in reality the average person wouldn’t have the slightest notion what metal was, outside of being an alloy or mineral. But to me this unique brand of music was life changing.

There was an energetic vigour to it that I had never experienced with conventional music before. Not just because it appealed to my introverted nature, or because I was some outlier of society or dissident of conformity, but i was instead emboldened by its impassioned ferocity. An expression of such uninhibited exuberance so attuned to my inert personality, even if that primal intensity wasn’t mirrored on the outside. I used to listen to entire album’s cloistered in the enveloping darkness. My modest headphones concealing the belligerent vocal snarls and aberrant lyrical confessions from my mother’s sensitive constitutions. A beneficial derivation for my reclusive misanthropy. With the immediate purpose being audibly escorted to an ethereal zenith of solitude. The music emanating a cathartic equanimity. A euphoric, existential breach of reality. An expression of serenity so pure and invigorating that its almost divine, despite the perceived vulgarity of its language. Deep shit!

When it comes to music I’m uncompromising. I can not tolerate music that doesn’t incite some emotional resonance. Music should be a reflection of our personable nuance, not merely asinine beats and contrived rhythmic futility. It should mean something. Speak to the listener in a way that feels intimate, even if it isn’t personally relatable. A brief, narrated recital that conveys its moral insight with vicarious accord, even if the message isn’t pertinent to yourself. Regardless of the genre, music isn’t simply an arrangement of notations and trivially constructed lyrics, but often far more engaging. It probably isn’t metal that inspires you. It might not even be something contemporary. Whatever it may be, do yourself a favour, take the time to really listen to music. Not just as some background ambience to lessen the monotony of washing dishes or muffle the frenzied squabbling of your children, but a moment for yourself to truly connect with the music, in a way that many of us sadly deny ourselves.

What music inspires you? Let me know in the comments below. Cheers.