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The Best And The Rest 20
Okay, let me get this out of the way. We know that metaphors are direct comparisons, and any comparison using words “like” or “as” is technically a simile, but we’ll use metaphors anyway to simplify the proceedings. I swear, we got so much flack (no, not Roberta…) because every entry used “like” and “as”, and we got so many texts correcting us. We know, we know…
February 21, 2008 → The Top Ten Metaphors
Ampalaya supreme – Men are like circus monkeys – damitan mo man, UNGGOY pa rin.
Veraesc – A hug is like a boomerang, you get it back right away.
Spongebob – A person is like a light. Light travels faster than sounds, that’s why someone appears bright until they open their mouth.
Raymond D. – Ang asawa, habang bata, parang sabaw. Mas masarap habang mainit. Pero pag tumanda na, parang de lata, bubuksan mo na lang pag talagang wala ka nang makain.
Shining – Men are like bank machines; once they withdraw, they lose interest / Men are like vacations; they never seem to be long enough.
BIGGIE – Being broken-hearted is like having a broken rib. On the outside, it looks like there’s nothing wrong…but every breath hurts.
Phambotsdad – Success is like a bus ride during rush hour; you want to get there fast, but the problem is, same as millions of other people.
TReiz – My mind is a Nautilus; beautiful, structured, spiraling, compartmentalized and sadly, full of air.
Dox – Smiles are like band-aids; they cover up the pain but inside, it still hurts.
No name – Marriage is like a fortress under seige; those outside fight so hard to get in, while those inside fight so hard to get out.
Paperjam Buster – Love is like a roll of tissue paper, you only realize its worth when you get to the last piece & see that most of it was wasted on shit.
Gerry – Ang buhay parang bola. Nagsisimula sa letrang “B”.
Chammy – Love is like waiting for a train…in a bus stop. You’ll never find one.
Simpleng Mataray – Success is like masturbation. Only your own hand can let you achieve it.
No name – The heart is like a puzzle; someone’s supposed to mess it up first…so someone else could fix it again.
Archangel – (written by a student in an essay) “Her hair glistened in the rain, like nose hair after a sneeze.”
No name – Families are like fudge…mostly sweet with a few nuts.
Lexigirl – Life is like a rock…it’s hard.
Tazme – Flattery is like chewing gum. Enjoy it, but don’t swallow it.
Mary Ann – Men are like stockings; they run when you need them the most.
ICE_WOLF – My heart is like an apartment. People settle in, but eventually they move out, having found some other place they’d rather call home.
Nicole – I am just like one great movie. The problem is, no matter how great the movie may be, after the show, everybody leaves.
Marian – HAPPINESS is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it, but only YOU can feel the warmth.
Fearless – Keeping a grudge is like drinking poison, and expecting your enemies to die.
Loipogi – Sometimes, poop that was flushed is like McArthur; it shall return.
No name – Life is like Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo…it’s short.
Mickhaille – T-backs are like barbwires. They pr0tect something without obstructing the view.
Tazme0317 – Women are like the police. They can have all the evidence in the world, but they still want a confession.
BIGGIE – Friends are like buttcheeks. Shit separates them but they always come back together.
Erolski – Ang jeepney parang titi…kung san masikip, dun sumisiksik.
***And here’s a pahabol entry that’s not really a metaphor, but a joke involving metaphors. I just thought you might enjoy it.
Maximo – In a rape case trial, the victim was asked what the suspect did. Victim: “Kinant*t po niya ako ng kinant*t!” Judge: “Order in the court! Please miss, use metaphors!” Victim: “Sorry your Honor, minetaphor po niya ako ng minetaphor!”
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