Losing My Hat

My wife and eldest child both made purchases this week that were pretty epic. First, my daughter had saved up and bought for herself a car. A yellow 2000 VW Beetle that she has lovingly named “Yellow Submarine.” Her mother and I drove with her for a few hours to pick it up and it was a pretty great experience. An elderly couple sold her the car that they’d had since 2005 and impressively kept in very good shape. They were a sweet pair that seemed to love their car. They loved Leah, too. But I figured that would happen.

My wife’s purchase was a set of books at the local ReStore. What made them special was that they were readers she and I both had in elementary school. On our way to pick up Yellow Submarine I was leafing through the I had in grade 2: It was nostalgic, of course, to see the familiar pictures and stories, but one caught my attention that I didn’t remember. “Mr.  Harvey’s Hat” is about a man who had gotten a new hat and lost it almost as fast as he’d gotten it. He seemed to love the hat but then went for a walk in some heavy wind and off it blew.  He yelled “Stop!” continually as he chased it down the street, but it kept going far away from him. The story follows the hat’s journey until it lands in a farm where a crow finds it. The bird places it on a scarecrow’s head so that he’ll be able to tell which “man” is the farmer and which is the scarecrow.

Spoiler alert! I know none of you are eagerly awaiting to read this story yourself, but I want to be fair. I’m about to give away the ending. Me so sorry…

So in the end we see Mr. Harvey going on a Sunday drive with his wife. They drive by the farm and Mrs. Harvey points out that the scarecrow’s hat looks just like his new one. The farmer looks up and is gobsmacked. “How could my new hat get out here?” he asks aloud. And then, without waiting for an answer, he smiles and says, “That is not my hat at all. Let’s keep going. It’s a good day for a ride in the country.”

It’s always fun for me to find a children’s story that allows the children to think on their own. The writer didn’t say why the farmer smiled nor why he made his decision. Some of the best books and movies leave the story open-ended like this. My take on the story? Mr. Harvey knew it was his. He saw that the hat had found a new home and loved that he’d had such a serendipitous experience in seeing it again. Now it was for someone else to enjoy, even if it was a scarecrow. Or a crow. He was happy with the ending and thought he’d leave it that way.

And that’s how I feel with my kids right now. We are not empty nesters, but we’re getting close. I don’t want to lose my children, and when they leave I may even run down the street yelling “Stop!” But I don’t own them. Someday I will see them living somewhere else making other people feel special just like they did for me. And I’ll be able to walk away with pride and happiness. I may even go for a ride in the country at that point.

Congratulations (another story about letting go). This is your week.

Best Actress:

Carrie Fisher as Princess Leia in

Best Actor:Harrison Ford as Indiana Jones in (as well as ).

Best Quote:KEN: “Love your leg warmers.” BARBIE: “Nice ascot.”

Just wanted to also add that I’m so proud of the people of Russia and Hong Kong fighting for their rights, freedoms, and justice as we speak. My heart is with them.