I’m thinking of ending things (2020)

Director: Charlie Kaufmann

Starring:

Full of misgivings, a young woman travels with her new boyfriend to his parents’ secluded farm. Upon arriving, she comes to question everything she thought she knew about him, and herself.

I don’t like metaphorical movies. ‘I’m thinking of ending things’ is probably one of the worst and most boring metaphorical movies I have ever had the displeasure of watching.

Sitting through 135 minutes of talking boredom just to see a twist ending is not my idea of being entertained. Analyzing films – and especially boring ones – are for critics with time on their hands to study them – like poetry. I like to be entertained when I watch a movie, not be bored to death.

The film is about Jake, who takes his girlfriend – who is known only as Young Woman – to meet his parents. (Only – and here’s the big spoiler!! – everything that happens here is just a figment of his imagination, which is why the girlfriend also doesn’t have a name.)

So, the film starts with a 22-minute scene of them driving, talking gibberish. (It’s clear they have nothing in common, but the ending will reveal why – if you get it.) This is followed by a 22-minute scene of them sitting around a dinner table with Jake’s parents – talking gibberish. We realize something is very off with his parents, but the film was so slow, I don’t think I cared one bit. It also didn’t make sense why the girlfriend didn’t respond to his parents suddenly turning old, and then young again – but this will (again) make sense (to some) with the reveal ending. After that there’s a 25-minute scene again of Jake and Girlfriend sitting in a car – supposedly driving – … talking…talking…talking…talking… They buy snow freeze, which they both find too sweet and then drive…and talk…and drive…and talk…and drive… just to find a place to discard of it.

Boy, this…was…oh…so…slow… friggin’ hell, could it have been ANY slower moving???!!! I get it, its a metaphorical movie, but for fu*k sakes, find a way to make it more interesting or faster paced!! It’s been a while since I’ve been THIS BORED with a film. What a waste of time!

‘I’m thinking of ending things’ received 117 award nominations, winning 14.

Would I watch it again? A RESOUNDING NO!!!