A Primer on Kindness

Kind words are good words; kind words are benevolent words; kind words are useful words. kind words are helpful words; kind words are words of courtesy. kind words are void of harshness and rudeness.

Maybe you have a friend that wants to make an unwise purchase. Maybe they can’t afford a new car, but they have decided to buy a 2019 Corvette. You are concerned they cannot make the regular payments. It frustrates you because they often make unwise financial decisions. You want to say something to express your concern to them. You want to help them be wiser with how they spend their money.

Solomon says, “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word (probably should be translated “kind”) makes him glad” (Proverbs 12:25). People respond “in kind” to kindness, don’t they?

Don’t underestimate the value of a kind word.

One of the voices in modern evangelicalism I would encourage you to get to know is Rosaria Butterfield. She is currently a pastor’s wife on the East Coast, but at one time was an “up and coming” English professor at the University of Syracuse, outspoken atheist, feminist and lesbian.

In her book about her journey to becoming a Christian (Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert), she talks about how she used to view Christians as “poor thinkers, judgmental, scornful, and afraid of diversity.” She submitted a critique on Christians in her local newspaper about and received an enormous volume of polarizing responses.

One surprising letter came from a local pastor. She said the tone was kind and civil but still contained probing questions. She didn’t know what to do with this latter. For 7 days, she left it on her desk because she had never received such a kind letter from someone who opposed almost everything she stood for.

She decided she wanted to meet this pastor. As a result of initiating a conversation, this pastor’s wife and the pastor became close friends with Rosaria, and their hospitality of welcoming her into their home eventually won her to the Lord Jesus Christ. Their kindness led her to the kingdom of heaven.

Kindness is not a small thing. “Whoever pursues righteousness and kindness will find life, righteousness, and honor” (Proverbs 21:21).