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Hello. My name is Twila and I will be writing in place of Troy today. Currently he is sprawled on his bed playing Scrabble on his phone complaining of “writer’s block.” So humorous. To have that you have to be an actual writer. You also have to have cogent thoughts and an elusive little element known as a point. But I won’t ruin it for him. Sometimes he’s adorable.

Now, onward to the matters at hand. I would agree that is a good movie. It’s a mouthwatering tease to the palette, except for the scenes involving human food. I would also like to recommend the movies and

(1 and 2)

The people I allow to live in my home feed me what looks like some kind of rancid kids cereal that’s been on the shelf for a few years. They don’t know that when they let me out at night I take a stroll to the nearest bistro I can find and enjoy a celeriac velouté with crispy pancetta. The staff always claim they’re “fresh out of rat,” a line I am increasingly aggravated by. This cursed town has proven itself to be completely barren of any decent sauvignon blanc, but I settle for a chardonnay or a sensible white wine and read a column or two from .

Which reminds me, would someone reading this with even a shred of compassion please come and take Anya away? They call her a cat, something I find highly offensive. She eats constantly from my bowl of “cat food” (a phrase I find equally offensive) like a filthy dog who just discovered garbage for the first time. She looks like a furry pillowcase full of marbles with a head. I’ve had it with her! Please, if you have any hint of decency at all, come get her and move her to the nearest foreign country. I would suggest Norton.

Well, I must say that paws are great for catching things but not for typing. Since I’ve saved you all from the drivel that you normally find on this blog, what can I say but, “You’re welcome.”

Congratulations This is your week.

Best Actress:

Meryl Streep as Julia Childs in Hard to argue with Meryl, though I’d like to give a shout out to Janeane Garofalo (Colette in ). She is so great! Somehow she manages to continually fly under the radar, but to me she always makes a move better by being in it. A couple favourites are (1999) and (1997).

Best Actor: Patton Oswalt as Remy in If you enjoy laughing and you haven’t heard his stand-up, you really need to!

Best Quote: “Shameless, isn’t it? The sheer nerve of the woman. Opening a chocolaterie just in time for Lent. The woman is brazen!” — Alfred Molina as Comte de Reynaud in

One more thing… this is Twila again btw… Many of you who come to visit my house will call me “the nasty cat” or “the mean cat.” A little bold of you considering how loud and intrusive  you are when cackling with my tenants, but that’s none of my business. However, there is something I want to share with you. I won’t say it now, but when you come to visit again, please come to see me. And lean in close. Real close.