A Director’s Story

I haven’t written much lately but it is in the off-season so there really isn’t a lot out there. (As I finished writing this sentence, I made sure to check La Verne and Willamette for any coaching news…and, there wasn’t.) I’m not sure how many out there like my random life stories but I thought I would trot one out today. (Yes, I am aware that “trot” can mean diarrhea. I don’t have a lot of hope for this one.)

I ran into a person I played volleyball against at the gym yesterday. He owned a local volleyball club for a lot of years and is currently a director at a club now. He mentioned that this past weekend there was a fight between two dads at a volleyball tournament. Just insane but most of us have been club parents and know how crazy the “other” parents can be. I’m sure I was one of these “other” parents at times and I’m sure if we’re all being honest, we all were or wanted to be at some point.

I do remember a time when my daughter first started playing volleyball and the club taught a defense that required the players to stay in their zone of responsibility. Now, my daughter started a little late in club so she wasn’t on the best team her first season and not everyone wanted to or could get to the ball when it entered their zone. After a number of times seeing the ball hit the floor near my daughter, I asked her why she wasn’t getting those balls. She told me it wasn’t in her zone. Now, I didn’t go crazy or anything but I informed her that the number one rule in volleyball should be that the ball doesn’t hit the floor without at least one person making an effort for it. Further, if all 6 make an attempt I’d be much happier than no one. I told her that in games if she can see that the player who’s zone it is will not get the ball then she should get it.

Cut out a few months and I’m buying dinner for the coach after a tournament. (Side note, if you ever see what these coaches make, especially the one’s that coach the lower teams, you really should buy them every meal possible.) I start talking about the club’s defensive philosophy and I instantly see the coach go rigid. I explain I just want to know the purpose behind it and that I really struggle to see balls that could be dug fall to the floor. She responded, “I’m aware you don’t believe in the philosophy.” The rest of the meal was a little awkward. I never talked to my daughter about this, but I can imagine how that conversation went on the sidelines between her and the coach when she dug a ball in someone else’s zone.

Cut to my daughter’s senior year and she really didn’t have a position. She was a setter that played behind a wonderful All-American and we had a new coach that was intent on playing a 5-1. In one preseason practice, as the story has been told to me, my daughter chases down a shanked ball and gets an up diving into the ball carts in front of the coaches. Ball gets put over and the rally continues. She became a DS at that moment and now had a position for her final year. I may have been wrong back when she started playing, but, yeah, I’m taking full credit for that play done in her senior year of preseason practice.

My long-ago former opponent also mentioned that he and his new club were recently sued for “$600,000,000” by a dad who claimed that his 13-year-old daughter didn’t get the playing time she deserved thereby costing her a DI scholarship and future income as a volleyball player. Now, I may have not heard the dollar amount correctly but, if correct, I’m thrilled at the future earnings of these young volleyball players. He said the lawsuit was thrown out by the judge but there were lawyer costs for the club and each individual named in the suit.

The craziest year of club for us came in our 17s season. My daughter switched to a smaller club so she could have a chance to play on the top team. The team finished in the top 15 the previous year and was retaining their core. The coach was an ex-player that was really high on my daughter but she was taking over the team for the first time and was really unprepared for what she was about to step into. I could write a novel about this season, or better yet a sitcom, but the year was a disaster. The returning core was all about the core and were fine as long as no one else played significant time. The parents (for the most part) were lockstep behind the players but the coach had other ideas. My first ever club meeting specifically dealing with a team my daughter was on was that year. (Narrator’s voice: It didn’t help.) Our last qualifying tournament ended with me standing in front of an irate father who was yelling at this coach how she destroyed his daughter’s DI chances. Most of the core quit before regionals, but the team did really well. I think we only had 6 or 7 players and it was definitely the most fun we had that year. I followed the college path of most of these core girls that decided to continue with volleyball and I don’t think any of them made it past their first year. One was kicked off the team after one month.

As most of my readers know, I’ve been retired now for a couple of years. The thing that comes back to me is that what I miss most are the people. My friends and co-workers. I NEVER miss the work. So, enjoy those volleyball relationships you make with the other parents and coaches and the players. Dropping a 5-set match to your rival (and the reasons why you think it happened) will sting for a while but it will lose its importance soon enough. You’ll be a lot better off long-term giving out hugs as you leave the arena than a sour disposition.